Zito ""The True History"

Zito was born in the rugged hills of North Italy to a family of noble state. His mother, Lavito Zito, was best known for championing the use of small woodland animals for band instruments. His father, Vito Zito, is remembered primarily for having outlived several of his gold fish. The only previous family member recorded was Uncle Frito Zito, who once pillaged a small Balkan Nation with two rocks, a four foot rope, and a one-eyed burro named Earl.

Zito exhibited athletic inclination early as an organizer and captain of the first Italian skydiving team. His success was limited due to the fact that parachutes were not to be invented for another forty-two years. While recovering in the Palermo hospital the young Zito turned his attention to science. As a result of his studies and experimentation he invented the world's first battery. Public acceptance of this development was hampered by the fact that electricity had not yet been discovered.

Frustrated, Zito chose to focus his attention on the arts. In short time he had formed the first ever all Czech salsa band. At the end of a European tour they pressed their first LP "Dead Monkey's Don't Shed". Seventy-eight years later, after the invention of the phonograph, it became something of a cult hit.

Disenchanted by the lack of innovation in Europe our man immigrated to America. Upon his arrival in Milwaukee, he formed the first ever all midget touring limbo team. Although the troupe achieved limited commercial success, their motto "Lower the Bar" eventually became the anthem of the Iowa State Track Team.

It was at the time searching for a way to keep his team occupied between performances that Zito invented tennis. The original game had no net or court boundaries. Two snow shoes were used to bash an inflated gerbil bladder across a parking lot until one opponent missed or collapsed. According to Zito "Nets isa for fishes and a lines isa for dancing". He was sorely offended when some English twits messed up his game and then took credit for inventing it.

A disenchanted man, Zito retired from public life and obtained employment as a bus driver for a correspondence school in Fargo. To this day he is revered by knowledgeable tennis players throughout the world- especially those who don't like lines and nets.

And from this honorable history is where Team Zito got its name.